Knowledge Is Power

What is courtesy? It is an act of showing politeness and respect in one's attitude and behaviour towards others.

What is courtesy in marriage? It is an act of showing politeness and respect in one's attitude and behaviour towards one's spouse.

Let me now discuss with you simple courtesy you must learn to be a good partner to your spouse and to make your marriage a going concern.

1. Learn to greet in the morning when you wake up, and when you are greeted, you must respond.
2. Learn to say goodbye whenever you are going out and not just leave without telling your spouse.
3. Learn to respond whenever your spouse is talking to you. Don't just keep mute. It is always annoying.
4. Learn to greet whenever you are back from work or an outing. And when you are greeted, respond.
5. Learn to appreciate your spouse whenever he or she does something good. It must not be when he or she does something bad that you must be talking or condemning. Appreciate and commend whenever he or she does good things.
6. Learn to say these words regularly: Thank you, Please, I love you, Excuse me, I am sorry, I miss you, You are looking good, You are the best, and any other romantic words that will make your partner excited and happy.
7. Never be abusive or violent with your spouse.
8. Learn the dislikes of your spouse and avoid doing them. This will prevent conflicts between you.
9. Never repeat the same mistake over and over again. This will also make you quarrel less.
10. Learn the likes of your spouse and do them. This will make your partner love you more.
11. Whenever you hear something bad about your spouse, verify the truth first before you react.
12. Do not be forced to do your responsibilities at home. Be doing it joyfully without anyone telling you to do them.
13. Be faithful to your spouse by avoiding extramarital affairs.
14. Never have secrets. Be open and transparent with your partner.
15. Whenever your spouse is angry, you are to keep silent to calm the situation. Two wrongs cannot make a right.
16. Do not love your family members, children or friends more than your spouse.
17. Never talk bad of your spouse in the presence of your family members, friends, children and any other third party.
18. Love your spouse's family like your family. Do not segregate.
19. Whenever you are confused or don't understand certain things about your spouse, do not assume but ask questions to get clarification.
20. Never lie to your spouse but make telling the truth your watchword.
21. Create time for each other daily to gist and discuss your daily activities. This may be either physical or virtual depending on the two of you.
22. Create time daily to pray together. Pray for your marriage, yourselves, your children, your family members and so on.

In conclusion, I want to encourage you to get involved in doing all the above-mentioned tips passionately, by so doing, the fire of love in your marriage will keep on growing. And the grace to be doing them, God will grant unto you in Jesus name. Amen. Thank you

The Bible says in Proverbs 22 vs 6 that Train up a child in the way he should go and when he grows up, he will not depart from it.

If you are a late comer to church you nurture a late comer child.

If you are the abusive type, you nurture an abusive child.

If you are the prayerless type, you nurture a prayerless child.

If you are the type that don't go to church, you nurture a child that does not go to church.

It goes on like that.....

What type of parents are you?

The way you do is the training path your children will follow.

Work on yourself more to have better trained children

The Bible says we should FIND. But some people PICK.

If you pick your marital partner and not find him.or her, the marriage will likely pierce you and make you have injuries and long-lasting scars.

But when you find your marital partner, the marriage will bring favour because you find.

This is because find and favour start with F. And pick and pierce start with P.

The choice is yours.

Which one do you want to do?

Find or Pick?

It must not be done in proxy( you do not send someone to do it on your behalf)

It may not necessarily involve a ring if you can't afford it.

A marriage proposal must be done by the guy and not by the lady.

The lady must give a response. It may not be immediate but there must be an answer of either yes or no.

A marriage proposal can be done physically, or through a video call, but text, chat, and email must not be used or encouraged. When a marriage proposal is made, when the two of you look at each other, it signifies seriousness and self-confidence on the part of the guy who wants to propose.

It can be done between the two of you alone or in the presence of people.

1. Don't let love blind you to red flags.

2. Don't over-trust when you are just starting.

3. Pray about the person you want to start a love relationship with.

4. Ensure effective communication and ask questions whenever you notice grey areas.

5. Do not allow sex until your wedding night.

6. Don't rush things; allow time to test the love you have for yourselves.

Many people assume that marriage will automatically solve their personal struggles. However, marriage is not a magic solution.

As a single person, ask yourself:

• Are you struggling to develop a consistent prayer life?
• Are you struggling to study the Word of God?
• Are you struggling with time management?
• Are you struggling with your finances?
• Are you struggling with sexual sins?
• Are you struggling with laziness?
• Are you struggling with bad character traits you are aware of?
• Are you struggling with church attendance, especially on Sundays?
• Are you struggling with holy living?
• Are you struggling with spiritual battles?

Marriage will not automatically help you overcome these struggles. In fact, if these issues are carried into marriage without being addressed, they are likely to increase and become a heavy burden on the marriage.

Singles, please do not waste your single season. Use this time to work intentionally on yourself, seek help where necessary, and build strong spiritual, emotional, and personal foundations before marriage.

Thank you, and may God bless you all.

In our generation, there are many debates about whether sex before marriage is acceptable. Is it truly permitted? The answer is No. Below are important reasons why sex should not be allowed before marriage.

1. It is against God’s instruction. The Bible commands us to flee fornication because it is a sin.
2. Your body is the temple of God and must not be defiled; it is meant to honour God.
3. Sex is not a means of proving or expressing love before marriage.
4. Anyone who allows or demands sex before marriage is more likely to become unfaithful in marriage.
5. Anyone who truly loves you will not pressure you to have sex before marriage.
6. Being a free sex giver does not attract genuine love; people may only be interested in your body.
7. Sex can become tiring in marriage when it is rushed prematurely—there is no need to haste.
8. Allowing sex before marriage can cause you to lose self-respect before your partner.
9. Many times, men do not marry women they had sex with before marriage because they may wrongly perceive them as cheap or promiscuous.
10. Abstaining from sex before marriage helps prevent unwanted pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases that can delay or destroy life’s vision.
11. Ladies often suffer the greater consequences of premarital sex—do not become a sacrificial lamb.

Conclusion:
No matter the pressure you face, always stand your ground and refuse sex before marriage. May God grant you the grace to remain firm and pure, in Jesus’ name. Amen.

It is appropriate that suitors should be approaching a lady at a certain stage of her life. When suitors are not forthcoming, it implies something is wrong somewhere. There are many ladies who are very beautiful, but no man is forthcoming for a love relationship. Some ladies are well-to-do, but no man is interested in them. This piece is to examine what may likely be the causes why suitors are not forthcoming:

1. Character defect:

No man can get attracted to a lady with a character defect. There are some questions I want to ask you now in relation to your character, and I will want you to have sincere answers to them:

• Are you saucy?
• Are you proud?
• Are you lazy?
• Are you the fighting type?
• Do you get angry easily and cause a scene anytime you are angry?
• Are you the loving type?
• Are you the caring type?
• Are you the smiling or frowning type?
• Are you respectful and submissive?
• Do you know how to cook?
• Are you the lying type?
• Do you steal or have an integrity issue?

I can still go on like that because there are still more character defects a lady can have. If you know you have a character deficiency, kindly work on yourself.

2. Spiritual cause:

There are times when the issue may be spiritual. But one has to be so sure of this to tackle the situation in a spiritual way. Have you ever noticed any sequence of late marriage or divorce in your family lineage? If there is none, then your situation may likely not be spiritual. But if there is, you need to tackle the situation spiritually.

How can you go about it spiritually? You need to pray, fast and go to God for a solution. The Bible say we should call upon him (Jeremiah 33 vs 3). You need to be spending time in the place of prayer to tackle the ugly situation. Once you are persistent in praying to God, He will surely answer your prayer and provide you with your own missing rib.

3. Wrong association:

When you are not associating with the right people, the people who may be interested in you may not see you. The question is who are the people you associate with?

There are some people who associate with married people only. This is not too good. They have already married. As a single, you are meant to mingle with your fellow singles more. In their midst is where you can see someone who may be interested in you.

More so, what do the people you associate with say about the opposite sex? Are you walking with people who have a negative mindset about the opposite sex? Are they the type that always say women are bad? Or men are not good?

If you are associating with people of this negative mindset, it can indirectly influence you. How? It can make you develop the wrong mindset or hatred for the opposite sex, which may chase suitors away from you. Kindly review your association to determine if you are to maintain it or leave it.

4. God's time factor:

The Bible says there is time for everything under the sun (Ecclesiastes 3 vs 1). It further says God makes everything beautiful in His own time (Ecclesiastes 3 vs 11).

Do you know that the right man may not come if it is not yet God's time? God has not forgotten anyone. It is just our duty to patiently wait for the right time He has designed to make things happen in our lives at His own time. Never be desperate or want to force the time to happen.

It is my prayer that the grace to patiently wait for God's time will rest upon you in Jesus name. Amen

5. Lack of attraction:

There is this general advice that is always given to a person who wants to get married that he or she must not choose based on physical attraction. This is true because physical features will fade with age.

However, to start a love relationship with someone, something must attract you to the person. It may not necessarily be physical attraction, but there must be a sense of attraction towards each other.

For you to get attracted to a man, let me ask you the following questions:

• Do you dress well? Not seductively.
• Do you smell well?
• No man is ready to marry someone with body odour. If you have body odour, you can get roll-on and perfume at a low cost to tone it down.
• Do you regularly look good?
• Are you a visionary and purposeful person in life?

Kindly answer all the above-mentioned questions sincerely and carefully meditate on all that you have read. This will help you know where to work more on yourself. Thank you

When in a love relationship/marriage, you and your partner must be intentional about your public conduct and comportment.

Neither of you must behave irrationally towards the other when in public.

You must ensure you respect each other when in public space.

Anytime you're both in public, people are watching and noticing your responses and behaviour to each other.

Whenever you are both in public, you have to take note of the following:

• Do not shout at yourselves in public.
• Do not fight each other in public.
• Do not say any annoying words to your partner
• If your partner is angry in public, you are not to be angry too. Whenever one person is angry, the other is to be calm.
• Do everything within your capacity not to get angry with your partner in public.
• Any conflict that may arise in public, hold it until you are alone together to sort it out. A public place is not the right place to settle conflicts.

Insulting, fighting, and embarrassing yourselves in public will affect your public image.

It can have a negative impact on your love relationship and personality.

It will not make people respect you.

It will cause disgrace for both of you.

Both of you must learn to comport and conduct yourselves whenever you are in public.

Thank you

When many are in love, they are lost in love.

All that the partner does is right and perfect.

There is nothing anyone says that they would listen to.

The red flags manifesting can never be seen.

Both would be swimming in the ocean of love.

However, it is good to be in love but do not be carried away by the aura of love you are experiencing.

Be sensitive to the stain available in the love.

Do not go too far before you identify the stain.

Whenever someone calls your attention to a stain on your partner, do not ignore it.

Verify if it is a stain that can be washed away or a permanent one.

Whenever you are in the ocean of love, put on safetymeasure to guide against being drawn in it.

Love is good but test it with time.

1. A love relationship is not meant for children and teenagers (anyone under 20 years).

2. Be emotionally, psychologically, mentally, and spiritually mature before starting a love relationship. This is to avoid heartbreak and prevent a bad experience.

3. As a man, ensure you have a stable source of income before you start a love relationship.

4. Avoid starting a love relationship when you are still in secondary school and a tertiary institution because it will affect you academically. Focus on one thing at a time.

5. If you are not interested in getting married, it is advisable not to get involved in a love relationship.

6. It is only advisable to start a love relationship when you have prayed about the person and convinced he or she is God's will for your life.

7. Don't involve sex in your love relationship to avoid unwanted pregnancy, giving birth out of wedlock, sexually-transmitted diseases, as they can have negative impacts on your life in the long run.

8. Get an experienced mentor to guide you whenever you want to start your love relationship.

9. Do not be desperate to start a love relationship because you may fall into the wrong hands.

10. Anytime you experience a heartbreak, it is not advisable to start another love relationship immediately. You need to give yourself a break to heal from the trauma.

11. Ensure you acquire the right and appropriate knowledge and information about a love relationship before you delve into it.

Thank you

1. When you don't have inner peace of mind whenever you see or think about your partner.

2. You get scared and not comfortable whenever you are around the person.

3. If it seems you are the one forcing yourself on the person or forcing the relationship to work. No commensurate commitment from the other person.

4. When the person sees you as a sex object or sex machine. It is only sex he or she wants from you.

5. If you are the only one giving in the relationship.

6. If the person does not respect you or your opinion.

7. If the person gives more attention to his or her mobile phone rather than to you.

8. If the person physically and emotionally abuses you.

9. If the person has never said I am sorry and I love you to you before.

10. If the person constantly embarrasses you in public.

11. The person doesn't appreciate your kind gesture, but talks it down.

12. If the person is bent on not ready to change in his or her character flaws.

13. When the person does not have you or inculcate you into his or her future plans.

14. When the person places his or her opposite-sex friends above you.

15. When the person is a cheat and promiscuous.

16. When there is no trust in the love relationship.

Thank you

1. When you are ready to start a love relationship with anyone that comes your way without doing proper investigation on the person.

2. You will consistently be putting yourself under pressure to start a love relationship.

3. When you give yourself a short time to marry without allowing time to test the love you both have for each other.

4. You don't listen and pay attention when people are calling your attention to red flags in your love relationship.

5. You allow sex in your love relationship to keep it.

6. You always want to start another love relationship immediately after every heartbreak.

7. You are ready to endure abuse and maltreatment just to marry a particular person.

8. When you see red flag as no issue.

A desperate person usually ends up in the hands of the wrong person and the wrong relationship.

Don't be desperate!

Thank you

It is not everyone who keeps quiet when angry that is a fool. When anger arises in you, and you calm yourself, it does not mean you are weak. It is all about emotional intelligence.

Sauciness is an enemy of successful marriage. When you don't know how to talk and control your mouth, you may likely have a problem in your marriage.

Train your mouth to speak less. Learn to control your tongue. It is not every word you respond to. When you talk too much or respond to every word, it is an act of weakness.

Let pleasant, encouraging and inspiring words be what will be proceeding from your mouth to your partner.

When your spouse makes you angry, do not respond but calm down. Process what you will say. Do not respond in anger as it will escalate the matter. And keeping quiet does not show you as a fool, but as the mature and stronger partner.

Many couples have used their mouth to destroy their partners and their marriage. Do not be like them. Rather, use your mouth to build your partner and marriage.

Thank you

As you are searching for a marital life partner, take note of the following:

1. Never rush to choose.

2. Involve God by praying for guidance.

3. Do not use your wisdom or human reason to make your final decision.

4. Do not choose someone who has the same weakness as you.

5. Do not choose someone who does not have the strength for your weakness.

6. Ensure you allow time to test your love for each other before you get married.

7. It is not only love that matters in making a marital choice. To learn more about other criteria, click on the link below and read Chapter 8 of the book titled How to make the right marital choice in life.

8. Do not get carried away by material things and physical appearance.

9. Do not choose someone who does not love and fear God.

10. Have a mentor to guide you. You cannot make a marital decision alone. You need guidance.

11. Do not allow sex until you get married.

12. Read books on love relationship and marriage and also attend seminars.

It is my prayer for you that you will not fall into the wrong hands in Jesus name.

Amen.

As you start giving birth in marriage, couples must take note of the following

1. Do not shout at your spouse in front of your children.

2. Do not argue or quarrel in their presence.

3. Never use foul language in their presence to each other.

4. Do not be settling dispute or conflicts in their presence.

5. Do not correct your spouse in their presence.

6. Be doing things together in their presence.

7. Be praying together with them and let them take charge of the prayer session sometimes.

8. Be correcting and disciplining them together.

9. Never caution your spouse in their presence when he or she is scolding and disciplining them.

10. Be eating together as a family.

11. Be gisting and talking together as a family.

12. Do not do bad things in their presence. They will start copying you.

13. Get involved in their academics by checking their school books and visiting them unexpectedly in school.

14. Be a friend to their school teacher. This will make you know more about your child outside the home.

15. Be involved in their day-to-day activities. Know where they go. And it must be with your consent.

16. Be a friend to your children. This will make you know them well, know their friends and know their secrets.

17. Be doing house chores together.

18. Whatever you ask them to do, do it first. Be as I do parent and not do as I say parent.

19. Do not let them use a mobile phone early. And whenever you give them, be monitoring the mobile phone.

20. Never curse your children no matter how angry you are.

21. Be providing for them and not let them be the ones fending for themselves. This will make them get unnecessarily exposed to societal vices.

22. Avoid sexual intercourse, kissing, and caressing in their presence or around them.

23. Take their spiritual growth seriously. Never let them stay at home when you are going to church. Always go with them. And whenever you come back home, ask them questions about what they have done in the church.

24. Let them see you and your spouse as friends. And see you both as being transparent to each other.

25. It is not always that you use a cane to discipline them. Let the usage of words be more. Learn to talk to them.

26. Whenever you finish disciplining them, learn to talk to them afterwards to have a discussion on the matter that led to the discipline.

27. Be going out together once in a while for public functions, to watch cinemas, to visit friends, etc.

28. Monitor what they watch on TV, and the Internet

It is my prayer that your marriage will continue to flourish in Jesus name

Amen.

1. The expenses will be more than the income

2. Always borrowing to argument his or her income.

3. He or she will be in debt.

4. Always buying everything he or she sees. He or she buys what he wants and needs.

5. He or she does not have any savings.

6. As his or her income increases, the expenses also increase.

7. He or she always wants to buy whatever is in vogue or trending.

8. He or she is not interested in cutting his or her expenses.

9. He or she always wants to do things to impress and prove to others. Always want to live large

10. Whenever his or her friends do anything, he or she must also do the same. He or she is into a competitive lifestyle.

11. He or she is always materialistic.

12. When spending, he or she does not think of the future but the present.

13. Always eating out and does not like cooking at home.

14. The belief of the person is that if you do not spend, another money will not come.

15. He or she does not believe in having a budget to plan with.

16. He or she will not finish paying one debt before collecting another one.

17. The person prefers buying things from expensive outlets in the name of wanting to buy quality.

Being prudent does not mean you are stingy. It implies you are wise and not wasteful in spending. If you want to be financially stable and independent, you must ensure that if you cannot grow your income, you cut your expenses. Be reasonable in your spending. Grow your income and never allow your expenses grow at the same rate as your income. Thank you.

When you say you love someone, it implies the following:

You can give the person gifts. You will not be stingy.

You can give the person your time.

You can give the person your money.

You can give the person your body( when married only).

You can save the person when in danger.

You can allow the person to know your secrets.

You can give the person the PIN to your mobile phone, ATM card, etc

You can lend a helping hand when in need.

You can go the extra mile to please and make the person happy.

You will show the family of the person love.

You will give the person joy and peace of mind and not physical and emotional abuse.

The price of the gift your partner wants will be meaningless to you because you can give him or her any gift.

The faults in your partner will not be seen and if seen, they will be overlooked.

You give the person support in anything he or she wants to do.

There is nothing you won't be able to give and do for the person.

When you say you are in love and you cannot give and do all the above-mentioned, you are not in love.

1. Learn to say sorry whenever you are at fault

2. Identify the dislikes of your partner and avoid doing them.

3. Avoid making the same error/mistake repeatedly.

4. Whenever your spouse is angry, keep calm and never alter any word that can aggravate issues. This is because two wrongs cannot make a right.

With these 4 steps, peace is guaranteed in your love relationship and marriage.

Are you finding it difficult to bond with your spouse?

Have you been noticing any emotional gap or distance between the two of you?

Are you eager to bond with your spouse?

The following are some tips that can help you achieve it:

1. Sleep together in the same bedroom on the same mattress

2. Bathe together

3. Eat together

4. Talk, gist and discuss together

5. Play together

6. Be in the kitchen together

7. Do house chores together

8. Go to public functions together

9. Always sit together whenever you go to public functions or to church

10. Go to church together

11. Go on a stroll, dates and vacations together

12. Make decisions together

13. Do not keep secrets from each other

14. Hug, hold hands, perk and kiss.

15. Sex regularly and never deny yourselves whenever it is needed.

16. Make it a duty to wear the same or similar attire or outfit to public functions, church, and so on.

17. Watch T.V, movies and cinema together.

18. Listen to music together and dance together.

Thank you.

1. Be the first person to call him and offer him a gift on his birthday.

2. Offer a helping hand whenever he needs help.

3. Know his favourite meal and cook or buy it for him occasionally.

4. Check on him via mobile phone once or twice a week to ask about his well-being.

5. Whenever you are discussing, initiate a discussion for the two of you to talk about your future plans.

6. Never talk ill of him in front of him or behind him.

7. Be happy and always get excited around him.

8. Occasionally joke with him with the word: " How is your girlfriend? This will give you a hint if he is in a relationship or not.

9. Avoid his dislikes and offending him.

10. Whenever you notice any need for him like a shirt, shoes, a tie, a wrist watch, and so on. Buy them as a gift for him.

11. Anytime he wears new or fine outfits, give a compliment.

12. Be interested in knowing everything about him.

13. If you are not friends before, move closer and be his friend.

14. Whenever any opportunity comes up during your discussions, tell him those things you like in a man that he has.

15. Memorise his mobile phone number and let him be aware you know it.

16. Learn to always greet him first whenever you come across yourselves.

17. Show interest in what he likes. This means like what he likes.

18. Always look towards his side whenever you are in a gathering.

19. Offer to pay his bills whenever the opportunity arises.

Thank you

This is a big question but let me answer it. An adult can be changed only if and when they are willing to change. However, an adult cannot change if he or she is not willing to change.

Change is a constant thing in life. Change can be positive or negative. Whichever the change, the person always determines it.

What makes marriage seem difficult nowadays? As we all know, it is adults who get involved in marriage. Then, why are they finding it difficult to get along with themselves? It is because the adults involved in the marriage are not ready to adjust, change and accommodate each other's excesses.

For any marriage to work, the adults involved must be ready to change their not-so-good way of life. If one of them is not adjusting, the marriage can still work if the other party is ready to accommodate the excesses. But if none is ready to accommodate each other's excesses, separation or divorce is inevitable.

My advice for you as an adult in marriage is that, there is no perfect person anywhere. Let us ensure we tolerate and accommodate each other's excesses. And let each of us be intentional in working on our weaknesses so that they will not be a burden on our spouse which he or she won't be able to bear.

Thank you.

Many people are heartbroken today because they overlooked certain things when they started their love relationship. To avoid being a victim of this, you have to guard against it. How? Whenever you want to start a love relationship with someone, ensure you ask the person this question: " Are you already in a love relationship?

Asking this question is very important because many would be in a love relationship and still want to start another with you. This is absolutely wrong. Someone may then say, what if the person lies? Yes, it is possible for the person to tell lies about it. But it is on record that you asked. You can also press further by investigating if the person is already in a love relationship.

Do not innocently jump into the arms of love relationship predators moving around seeking whose heart they would shatter. Do not be shy to ask and investigate if he or she is already in a love relationship before you say yes as a lady or before you propose as a guy. This will likely save you a heartbreak.

Thank you

There is a general saying that we learn from our mistakes in life. But the question is, must we make mistakes in life? Must we use our mistakes to learn in life? I want to tell you today that it is not all mistakes that you can have a second chance. Additionally, do you know that there are some mistakes that, once made, cannot be corrected? An example is making a wrong marital choice. Do not engage in trial and error or gamble during your marital choice decision process. It is not a mistake someone should wish his or her enemy. Marital choice is a one-time decision that one must be very careful and meticulous about when making it. It is not the one you choose today and say you don't want the person tomorrow. If you do not want to endure in your marriage, do not make a mistake when choosing. If you don't want to have regret some years into your marriage, please do not make any mistake when choosing your marital life partner.

As I conclude, do the following not to make mistakes when choosing a marital life partner:

1. Involve God in the process.

2. Get a mentor to guide you.

3. Be humble to be mentored.

4. Acquire the requisite knowledge on love relationship/marriage. You can get this by reading books, listening to messages and attending seminars.

5. Be working on yourself in your area of weakness.

6. Ask questions whenever you are confused and you need clarity.

Thank you and it is my prayer that you will not make a mistake when making a marital choice in Jesus name. Amen
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It is only in the marriage institution that a certificate is given to couples before they start the union. Do not collect a marriage certificate unless you attend marriage school.

A certificate is given to someone who has been found worthy in character and learning. This means the person must have passed through certain academic processes by attending lectures, studying, writing exams, writing projects, and attending a variety of seminars.

But if I may ask, how many of our young people today intentionally prepare for marriage? They receive a marriage certificate on their wedding day without passing through the requisite processes to make them qualify to collect a marriage certificate.

If you are a single reading this piece, ensure you attend marriage school before you do your wedding. You may be thinking how do I attend a marriage school?

This is how to attend marriage school:

1. Get a mentor whose marriage is working to be your guide.

2. Invest in love relationship and marriage books and ensure you study them.

3. Attend love and marriage seminars frequently.

4. You can register with Love and Marriage Life Coaches to nurture you.

5. Ask questions from older people so they can share life experiences with you. This will always make you learn more.

There is an adage that says, " He who fails to plan, plans to fail. Marriage does not succeed by luck or chance. It works based on intentionality and strategy. Start preparing for your marriage now before it is too late.

Thank you

In marriage, you end where you start. Two people(husband and wife) usually start a marriage. But some months/years into the marriage, more participants join the team who are the children. These children are in the union for a moment. They will eventually leave Daddy and Mummy to form their own family too. When they leave, who will remain? Daddy and Mummy are left all alone. This implies that as husband and wife, you will one day still end the way you started. The two of you started the marriage and the two of you will end it.

Now my advice to couples is that you must NEVER allow the presence of your children in your marriage to affect the love between you and your partner. If you do, it is both of you who will suffer it because you will not find yourselves interesting again as lovers when your children have long gone to build their own families.

Love your children but do not love them more than your spouse. Care for them but care for your spouse more.

Do everything possible in your capacity to keep and preserve the fire of love you share with your partner, not because of today but because of tomorrow.

Thank you

Marriage seems to be difficult because you both continue to work on yourselves and your marriage until death do you part.

The truth is that there is no perfect marriage. But you continue to navigate perfection by working on yourselves intentionally.

Marriage is all about work. You continue to work and work until you get things right in your marriage. How then can you work on your marriage:

1. Identify your weaknesses and work on them intentionally

2. Identify the dislikes of your spouse and avoid them.

3. Identify the weaknesses of your partner and call his or her attention to them.

4. You must both ensure consistent communication. You must regularly be talking to yourselves on your areas of improvement.

5. Do not let your strength turn into weakness.

In conclusion, always remember that the day you stop working on your marriage, the day it stops working. Thank you.

When people gain admission into higher institution, they are determined to go for lectures, burn night candles, go for tutorials and study hard to excel and have good grades.

After the graduation, some people immediately start their second degree or professional exams to upgrade themselves to be in a better position to compete favourably in their chosen field.

Whenever the opportunity to work and build a career comes their way, they are so determined to excel to get to the zenith of their career. This they will achieve by attending training programmes/courses, undergoing mentorship, behaving well and abiding by the policies of the organisation.

But what used to amaze me is that, the same people who do all the above are very lackaisicical when it comes to marriage. Majority of them are very unserious to be intentional to make their marriages work.

If I may ask you, when last did you attend seminar because of your marriage? When last did you buy and read books just to make your marriage work? When last did you call your mentor just to share life experience with you so that you will avoid the mistakes he or she has made maritally?

No marriage can work by chance or default. You have to make it work by doing all what you do to make your career, and academics work. Put into your marriage the energy you put into your career or academics and see if your marriage won't be blissful.

Do not take your marital life with levity. Be intentional and work hard to make it work.

Thank you

To identify a strong man is not by physical appearance. It is not how the man can win a fight with another man.

There is an attribute a man must possess to show him as a strong man. The attribute is his ability to resist and not fall for sexual temptation from a woman.

Every man likes women. Every man has the tendency to be polygamous. You may not if and only if you are a disciplined man who has learnt the act of sexual self-control.

If a man wants to be trapped, it is a woman who is used to do so because the weakness of every unguarded man is a woman.

A woman has the power and influence to put any man under control. It is only a strong man who can be an exception. And a strong man is anyone who has trained and disciplined himself to flee any sexual temptation from a woman.

Are you a strong man?

A beautiful lady is not the one who is physically attractive.

A strong lady is not the one who has physical strength or stamina.

Who then is a beautiful and strong lady?

She is the one who has good character and cannot fall for the temptation of money and material things by any man.

Beautiful they say is in the eyes of the beholder. However, the real beauty of a lady is in her character. If a woman/lady is attractive physically and does not have good character, she is not beautiful. But if a lady is not physically attractive but has good character, she is the most beautiful.

Women love money and comfort. And men who want to get any lady use these two instruments to get and catch their attention. Many weak ladies have fallen into the trap of deceptive men through their lack of uncontrolled appetite for money and comfort.

Money and comfort are good but too much hunger for them is not good. As a lady, ensure you have and develop a controlled appetite for money and comfort. This will save you on the day a man may want to take advantage of you by using money and comfort for you.

As a lady, you don't know if you are strong until you pass the test by a man who will want to use money and comfort to catch your attention and to have you.

Always be a beautiful and strong lady all the time!

There is a notion about old people that they spoil children. The way the firstborn is trained is always different from the way the last born is trained. Though depending on the age of the parents when the youngest was born. In general, the way our older people used to train their own children is always different from the way they train their grandchildren. Yes, they pamper them more. They take things more easily with them. They always reduce the standard of training.

Having said this, I want to draw our attention to someone in the bible who did not behave like our older people of nowadays even at his old age. The person I am talking about is Abraham.

Genesis 21 Vs 2a says for Sarah conceived and bare Abraham a son in his old age .... Abraham gave birth to Isaac when he was old. But there is one beautiful thing about him, he did not because he was old reduce the standard of training for his son. How did I know this? Let us check Genesis 24 Vs 1-9. This is where Abraham put a system in place to guide his son Isaac on his marital choice so that he would not go contrary to the will and covenant of God. He ensured he guided him not to choose wrongly. He did not choose a particular lady for him but he put a guide in place to help him choose rightly.

Abraham was very old when Isaac wanted to marry but he did not feel unconcerned or want to leave him to do whatever he wanted to do. He did not say he was old enough to make the right choice. But he guided him.

My admonition is that let us all be like Abraham. Do not say that because you are old, you will feel less concerned about your children's life decisions. You are not to make the decisions for them but you are meant to guide them. You are to ensure a system is in place to guard them against life errors.

You are to use your experience in old age to guide and help your children make the right decisions. You are still responsible for them even at your old age.

Thank you.